The Ten Commandments of Perfect Gig Etiquette: A Veteran's Guide

If you're like me, you've probably attended countless gigs and festivals, and witnessed both awe-inspiring performances and cringe-worthy moments. As a seasoned concert-goer, I've picked up a thing or two about the dos and don'ts of gig etiquette - having been guilty of many myself in the past. In this blog post, I present to you my ten commandments for perfect gig etiquette.

Thou shalt not be a human camera tripod

1. Thou shalt respect personal space: When attending a gig, remember that personal space is sacred. Nobody likes to be elbowed or have their toes stepped on. Maintain a comfortable distance from others and be mindful of your movements, ensuring everyone has enough room to enjoy the show.

2. Thou shalt not obstruct the view: We've all been annoyed by that one person holding up their phone or waving a giant sign in front of our faces. Don't be that person. Be considerate of those around you and avoid obstructing their view. If you must capture a moment, do it quickly and lower your device to allow others an unobstructed experience.

3. Thou shalt not talk over the music: Concerts are about immersing yourself in the music and connecting with the artist's performance. Avoid talking loudly or engaging in lengthy conversations during the show. Save the chit-chat for the breaks or after the performance. If the show, or the song, is acoustic or a ballad, or something quieter than the norm, and you really have to tell your friend about what happened last weekend at that exact moment, just go to the toilets to do it!

4. Thou shalt not push and shove: Mosh pits may be an exception, but in general, shoving and pushing people is a big no-no. Respect others' personal boundaries and remember that everyone is there to enjoy the music. If you want to get closer to the stage, politely navigate through the crowd without causing discomfort. The flipside is also true, if somebody has left their space to go for a drink or toilet, don't be a dick by not letting them get back through to their friends.

5. Thou shalt silence thy phone: Nothing breaks the spell of a live performance like a sudden burst of a ringtone or notification sound. Put your phone on silent or vibrate mode before the gig starts. If you must check your messages or take a call, step away from the crowd to avoid disturbing others.

6. Thou shalt not be a tall tower: If you're blessed with a lofty stature, be mindful of those behind you. Consider moving to the back or side areas where your height won't block the view of shorter individuals. And if you can, offer to switch places with someone behind you who might have a harder time seeing. If you're six-foot tall and you deliberately stand in front of somebody shorter, you're a tit.

7. Thou shalt not be a human camera tripod: While it's great to capture memories of your favourite gigs, constantly holding up your phone or camera throughout the entire show can be bothersome to those around you. Limit your recording to a few key moments and then savour the rest of the performance with your own eyes. Trust me when I say you will never watch that video of that song you recorded on your phone, and if you do, it will sound shit.

8. Thou shalt not be a creep: Granted this one has to be aimed at the men, I'm yet to see it happen the other way round. Don't be a creep, don't go grinding on the person in front of you. The same rules about respecting people are in full force at a gig, just the same as they are everywhere else. Also, if you see it happening, step in or report it.

9. Thou shalt not smuggle in excessive belongings: We all want to be prepared, but carrying a huge backpack or bag can be cumbersome and take up space. Keep your personal belongings minimal and avoid bringing unnecessary items. This ensures a comfortable environment for both yourself and those around you.

10. Thou shalt show appreciation: Lastly, but most importantly, show appreciation for the artists performing. Applaud, cheer, and get lost in the music. Artists feed off the energy of the crowd, so let them know you're enjoying their craft. A little positivity goes a long way in creating a memorable experience for everyone. This also goes for the support acts, if you don't like them, that's fine, just leave and go to the bar - don't stand there and be disrespectful.

By following these ten commandments of perfect gig etiquette, we can collectively create an atmosphere where everyone can enjoy the music to the fullest.